the writings of my future

2011

2011-01-08T01:23:00.002+08:00

im welcoming the 2011, the new decade, with open heart. happy new year and happy new decade. i still feels like living in 90's.

im writing this entry at a very odd place you can imagine.
people around me are people who i dont want to meet in my real life.

2010 has been a year that changed my life, how i view and appreciate things.

i donno what to write anymore. so many things inside my head right now.

i hope you guys are doing good. well, no one reads my blog. so, this is just reminder to me in future.

when i leave soon, i hope they will understand.
i think im done. you guys dont need me anymore.
(;

tata and goodnight

hey guys

2010-12-02T03:25:00.002+08:00

1 December of 2010.

exactly 30days to 2011. whoa.
ive been gone from this blog for so long, i think im writing again.
so how are you guys doing? i hope everyone in good shape and fine.
well, 2010 bring so much to me. whether i like it or not. im welcoming 2011 with all my heart.

time went so fast, i cant even see it moves. what i know is i will wake up in the morning, each day, everyday.

i wanna write more, but i dont have time.

you people are funny, i laugh everyday. seriously.

mom

2010-06-30T21:20:00.001+08:00

after a while, i think im writing again.

for the last 4 months, things has been rough for me. things were never easy for me.
since i was young. since my love heart has left me 22 years ago. i thought i am tough. i am not.

when i was young, when i get sad, i will always go to a corner of a room, sit there, hold my knees and cry. after a while, she will come and calm me and ask me to stop crying.

and i still do that nowadays. but, there's no one will come and calm me down now. i wish she is still around. she wont come, she's in Heaven.

Mama, please forgive me for what i've done. i failed you. i didnt be the kid you always wanted me to be. you sent her to me, for me to take care of. but i failed too. i am sorry.
Mama, please help me. I'm lost. I never ask for your help all these while.I love you, and i know you will love her too if you see her. i think you had seen her.

I will talk to you again soon.

a while

2010-03-16T11:04:00.002+08:00

i dont really want this,
i dont want to hurt anyone,
i dont want to hurt myself or you,
i want to correct things,
i want to make everything works,
i want to be with you again,

i know im not with you 24 hours in a day anymore
i know i cant do many things we did before now
and i cant be anything i was before

im sad im sad because i cant
i love you more than you know
i dont want to leave you just because we're not like we used before
but if you feel you dont like it,
and you feel we might as well be friends,
im not gonna hold you,
im not gonna be mad at you

you're just starting your life,
you have friends now
you have things in your life now,
i am happy to see you

i miss you
i miss us
i miss everything

sometimes life has another plan for us,
we might never know,
we can try, we have to try
but we will never know

do not worry about me

friday

2010-03-05T16:07:00.000+08:00

i miss her

11

2010-01-15T02:09:00.000+08:00

happy 11 darl!

mwa mwa!

welcoming the 2010

2010-01-07T04:59:00.002+08:00

its been awhile since my last post.
and now we're entering a new decade, twenty-ten. we will no longer call "two thousand something".
its now twenty eleven, twenty twelve. oh 2012 we all gonna die, yeah right.
i like it, its like back in 90s, where we said nineteen ninety five. whoa

hmm. well im turning 26 in four months.
i have to admit that im old now, passing the figure 5 in your age range will obviously make you scared. im scared. never been this scared.
why do i scared?

well, i havent graduate from my uni, few more subjects left. i wish i have fifteen thousands ringgit in cash so i can pay my fees and leave it for good. i wish. wish is not enough. i need to work my ass out.

i have nothing, i have no car, no jobs, no house, no savings, nothing. i am zero.
i have to struggle now, i have to do what i want to do, i need to finish what i have started, i need to start now, or everything will falls apart.

but luckily i have a good set of friends, great business partner(s), i have a awesome bandmates that i admire (yes you guys yaw), and most importantly, i have a very supportive,understandable,loving,bomel,bam,buk girlfriend that i love so muchhh.
add all together, i know im still ahead of most of people i know.

i care less for status, i care less having a big car with a big house, i care less to wear fancy pancy clothings, but less is not zero. i still want a nice car, a good house, and wear good clothes.
wanting, and needing, is a different thing.

peer pressure never effects me. but life pressure always effects me.
right now, in my 26, life started to get serious. everything evolve.
i have to get serious, in everything i do. even tho it is just something not serious like washing my face.

getting serious in whatever i do, is my new year resolution.

i laid back alot before, my work never done in time, my projects never get started or finished. so this is it. i will get serious.

there will be some big things that will happened this year to me. my band will released our first album, which i will definitely cry when i hold them in my hands later. im gonna get myself a car. im gonna start serious doing business. im starting my own magazine soon. cd store, merch store, clothing label, record label.

i hope i can be more dicipline in order to get all those things happened. and i will. this is my future, this is the starting line. its now, or never.
i choose this path, i never plan on working 9-5, never plan to do stuffs for bosses. never plan to have bosses. im not normal, this is my shot. if i failed, i'll do what everybody do.

this is a big challenge for me. i love challenge. always does. time is running and i can no longer be laid back, and play like i used to. but i will play and laid back as usual, this time with a purpose.

there are so many things that i regret, not because i did things, because i didnt. its not too late for me.future is now. now or never.

im scared. im not scared of failure. im scared of things that i dont do.

darling,

im so sorry if i hurt you, or make you cry. i never meant for that
there are so many things running in my head now, and those things are like scattered jigsaw puzzle.
i need to put them together piece by piece, until the whole picture is complete.

to do that, i need time just for myself. to think, to relax, to get some perspective.
im not in a good shape right now, sorry if i push you away. i just dont want to drag you in my turbulence. give me time, i will get myself together. i promised you with all my heart.

this is not about you, this is about me fighting with myself in order to face my future.
i hope you understand. i will see you in a week from now, and i promise to finish the puzzle by then. i know i can. and i will.
i love you so much, you're my best friend my lover my all. you know that. it never change.

well its late now and i have to go.
i end this entry with some words

Life is not about working , making money and buying what you want ..
But life is about being happy , love and health ..most importantly DOING WHAT YOU WANT AND BE PASSIONATE ABOUT SOMETHING .

(;

happy 22nd

2009-11-23T04:13:00.000+08:00

happy 22nd darling,
i loveyousomuch

mwamwa!

miss

2009-10-20T11:29:00.001+08:00

i am missing you very much

brand new eyes

2009-10-14T15:04:00.002+08:00

yeah, its paramore's new album title.
but not what exactly what im saying now

my right eye bergerak, kelopak mata bergetar, mcm nak menangis tu.
i read in the Net, orang tua tua cakap, im going to meet someone that live far far away, or someone i havent met long. i donno who, but adam is coming home this 31st.
and ada juga cakap ada somthing good and unexpected will happened, mcm dpt duit ke.
hahah i donno. very hope!

other scientific explaination is im stress, tension, mcm tu la. i donno probably

well whatever the reasons are, memang tgh tension sebab mata kacau nak buat kerja.
mcm kena tidur saja .hahaha

well..lets see what's coming

8

2009-10-14T01:52:00.001+08:00

Oh I have a lot to say was thinking of my time away
I missed you and things weren't the same

Cause everything inside it never comes out right
And when I see you cry it makes me want to die

I'm sorry I'm bad I'm sorry you're blue
I'm sorry about all the things I said to you
And I know I can't take it back
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds,
and baby the way you make my world go round
And I just wanted to say I'm sorry

This time I think I'm to blame
It's harder to get through the days
You get older and blame turns to shame

Every single day I think about how we came all this way
the sleepless nights and the tears you've cried
its never to late to make it right
all right sorry

I'm sorry baby
I'm sorry baby
yeah
I'm sorry

happy 8 monthlySARY d;

I need to take a (Holiday)

2009-10-10T05:34:00.000+08:00

When I was younger I used to be wild
As wild as an elephant's child
No one could hold me down
No one could keep me around
Now it's your turn, take a shot
Baby show me everything that you got
Maybe you can keep me alive
Maybe you can get in my mind
But it's only a matter of time

Before I run far away
I need to take a holiday
Maybe it's a fall from grace
I gotta find a new place
A holiday
I'll set off on a new chase
I gotta see a new face
I need to take a holiday

My father, he was always wise
As wise as an elephant's eyes
He couldn't hold me down
He couldn't keep me around
So are you gonna take your shot?
It's the only one that you got
Maybe I'll go out on a limb
Maybe I'll jump in for a swim
When the lights go dim

You know I'll run far away
I need to take a holiday
Maybe it's a fall from grace
I gotta find a new place
A holiday
I'll set off on a new chase
I gotta see a new face
I need to take a holiday
(Need to take a holiday)

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa

A new start
I've broken too many hearts
And I don't have any clue where to go
I don't know
But maybe I'll be back someday after my holiday

When I was younger I used to be wild
As wild as an elephant's child
And I don't think I'll ever change
I think I'm gonna stay the same

I'll run far away
I need to take a holiday (need to take a holiday)
Maybe it's a fall from grace
I gotta find a new place
A holiday
I'll set off on a new chase (set off on a new chase)
I gotta see a new face
I need to take a holiday

A new start
I've broken too many hearts
And I don't have any clue where to go
I don't know
But maybe I'll be back someday after my holiday

All of the wasted time
The hours that were left behind
The answers that we'll never find
They don't mean a thing tonight

i wonder

2009-10-05T04:45:00.001+08:00

i wonder if anybody still read my blog.

hmm

you belong with me

2009-10-04T17:23:00.000+08:00

You're on the phone with your girlfriend, she's upset
She's going off about something that you said
'Cause she doesn't get your humor like I do

I'm in the room, it's a typical Tuesday night
I'm listening to the kind of music she doesn't like
And she'll never know your story like I do

But she wears short skirts, I wear T-shirts
She's Cheer Captain and I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
That what you're looking for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
You, you belong with me, you belong with me

Walking the streets with you and your worn-out jeans
I can't help thinking this is how it ought to be
Laughing on a park bench, thinking to myself
Hey, isn't this easy?

And you've got a smile that could light up this whole town
I haven't seen it in a while since she brought you down
You say you're fine, I know you better than that
Hey, what ya doing with a girl like that?

She wears high heels, I wear sneakers
She's Cheer Captain and I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
That what you're looking for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
You belong with me

Standing by and waiting at your back door
All this time how could you not know?
Baby, you belong with me, you belong with me

Oh, I remember you driving to my house in the middle of the night
I'm the one who makes you laugh when you know you're 'bout to cry
And I know your favorite songs and you tell me 'bout your dreams
Think I know where you belong, think I know it's with me

Can't you see that I'm the one who understands you?
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
You belong with me

Standing by and waiting at your back door
All this time, how could you not know?
Baby, you belong with me, you belong with me

You belong with me
Have you ever thought just maybe
You belong with me?
You belong with me

mwa

2009-10-02T11:57:00.001+08:00

i miss you );

holiday

2009-09-26T13:56:00.001+08:00

i wanna go to an island, to a beach ..
and spend time thinking to myself for a week.

6 months!

2009-08-16T13:30:00.001+08:00

happy 6 month! LOVE YOU MOREEEE!

Great MTV World stage

big breakfast in bed, nothing can beat this weekend!

love you mwamwmwa

MTV WORLD STAGE TICKET UP FOR SALE

2009-08-10T01:28:00.001+08:00

2 tix up for grab,

leave your comments as your bid!

starting rm10

d;

whoa

2009-08-06T12:17:00.001+08:00

hey people,
i'll plan to change my blog url into somthg else,
and layouts
and what will the contents be.

so, expect somthg

i am so missing you darling!

Event of the year - MTV World Stage

2009-07-28T23:49:00.003+08:00

Yeah!
im going to MTV World Stage this 15 Aug. No matter what will happens or comes, i absolutely will go.

Why? two of my fav band Boys Like Girls and The All-American Rejects are playing, along with Hoobastank, Pixie Lott, local act Estranged and few more!

Wohoo sayang we are goingggg!!
cant wait d:

lesson

2009-07-27T04:04:00.002+08:00

hey readers,

a lesson for today-

whatever you do in DA Intarweb, people are watching you.
lovers, haters, envy-iers, stalkers, bad people, bad friends, evil,
most of them, hate you.

so beware,
intarweb (internet) is evil. i personally hate internet nowadays.
even Trent Reznor quit Twitter

xoox!

Kerja interior design pertama!

2009-07-24T13:47:00.004+08:00

ahaha, ni saja nak share dgn korang.
kerja aku dulu sebagai kontraktor dekat rumah sendiri (isi masa lapang)
Ni dapur rumah aku, di-ubah suai dari dapur lama masa tahun 1991 dulu
So setelah satu dekad, byk benda dah rosak, paling teruk kena serang anai-anai

habis rosak semua built-in cabinet.
so dgn RM2000, aku repair everything, letak ubat anai-anai.
and dkt bawah ni hasil dia

cabinat bawah punya frame habis reput, some of the door kena makan anai-anai

banyak cabinat punya frame terpaksa buang sebab rosak teruk anai-anai makan.
so aku repair balik semua pintu. plaster, potong kayu, tebuk dinding, pecah sana sini

and walla!

disebabkan dapur aku sangat luas, aku cat dia kelabu supaya nampak tak "spacey" sangat

semua pintu cabinet dah repair, tukar cat bagi nampak modern sikit

hehe

so, rumah sapa2 perlukan contractor kurang berjaya, sila la contact okay
heheh

remembering this,

2009-07-20T23:53:00.001+08:00

I love you. I am who I am because of you. You are every reason, every hope, and every dream I've ever had, and no matter what happens to us in the future, everyday we are together is the greatest day of my life. I will always be yours.

remember this, each day, every morning, every night

5th!

2009-07-18T22:35:00.001+08:00

sayang,
happy 5th!!!

woh dah 5! nnt 6 pastu 7..pastu 12

wohoooo
i love u so much!

i wish..

2009-06-29T01:16:00.003+08:00

i wish i can have this

pls pls God i want this );

ni nama dia X2 XDS95, wireless guitar system (stompbox style) .
benda ni di-edarkan oleh Line6 .

very handsome and reliable and high quality wireless set.
and the best thing is, its small !
you can get it at RM900 in Malaysia, RM700 in Singapore, and some online store for usd$199

read review from a user here
http://bluesharpamps.blogspot.com/2009/05/review-line-6-x2-digital-wireless-xds95.html

Communcation evolution! Celebrating 25 years of online communication

2009-06-14T14:51:00.002+08:00

daRn!
lets watch this video and bring back our memory! (maybe if you're born 1986 n below)

(try to look in your Program Files > Accessories > Communication > Hyper Terminal, i used to chat with my buddy and send files via this thing long time ago)

i love the old internet );

maybe i'll write more about the old internet stuffs later.

Communication Evolution @ Yahoo! Video

Backstreet Boys - Just Want You To Know

2009-06-04T02:41:00.002+08:00

this is probably the best, simplest, catchiest, heaviest, headbangest, and awesomest song by Backstreet Boys!

They're boy band legend, they're also rock legend! LOL

Yes guys, im honestly love this song and this video so much.
i even played on my guitar and sing it!

enjoy! d:

Backstreet Boys - Just Want You To Know (Official Music Video) - Click here for the funniest movie of the week

hello

2009-05-31T20:01:00.002+08:00

hey you guys!

notice :

if you guys still read this blog, please "follow" me okay.

im going to private this blog.

im sick with stalkers and people from the Internet.

tambah2 yg nak amik tau sgt pasai aku.

bole pulak nak google2.

damn YOU

Free Rapidshare Account!

2009-05-29T01:55:00.001+08:00

(Disclaimer: use it at your own risk, thanks)

suatu ketika dulu..

2009-05-25T22:44:00.000+08:00

Feb 22, 2008 5:42 PM

any song. depends on function yg diorg invite

Feb 21, 2008 6:34 PM

no. i fcm beta..

Feb 21, 2008 12:31 PM

thanx for d offer
but i dun think i have time utk sume ni lagy bwt mase skrg. hee

Feb 21, 2008 12:23 PM

interesting songs

Scrubs Season 9

2009-05-25T13:32:00.001+08:00

For Scrubs fans! there will be Season 9!! but i dont think JD will be there anymore..
soo..lets hear it
Zach Braff talked about Scrubs!

"
To clear up the confusion:
Scrubs will be coming back, but in a new incarnation. Scrubs as we've all known it is over. That chapter is closed. But as there are so many fans of the characters and writing of the show worldwide, the powers that be have decided to try and keep them alive a little longer (in the spirit of "Frasier" being a new chapter of "Cheers".)

I will be in the first 6 episodes of this new incarnation to help transition the show into what it will become. And then I will be off to work on some new projects that I'm very excited about/ write my new movie/continue to learn how to fly airplanes. :)) As to what the new show is? That's only clear in the mind of Bill Lawrence at this time.

I know many of you will have very strong opinions on this topic. And I respect them all. But first and foremost, if any of you were in a position to put about 200 people whom you really loved back to work in this economy, you would do it in a second. That has always been in the back of Bill's and my mind; we just didn't imagine ABC would ever give us the opportunity to keep it going.

If anyone can find an interesting new shape for the show it's Bill. Don't hate it until you see what he comes up with. Once its up and going there will be plenty of time for you to decide whether you love it or hate it.

Hope this clarifies a few things. That's all the info there is on that right now... I hope this finds you smiling,
love,
zb"

Hello, is this the band?

2009-05-21T15:13:00.003+08:00

saja nak post pasai band sendiri..

besa la org kata syoq sendiri.. takpa la. band sendiri. syoq pun sendiri la kan.

hehehe..

ni video kami perform dkt Wisma Bentley last 17may. Thanks to Homegrown Production.siap ada 3 angle camera lg, nnt kalau depa release, aku upload ya (: .

tp yg ni from camera fon saja. tp camera fon mahal ok. expressmusic 5800 !
thanks to my lovely Avril for her phone, and Wan-Tu-Tri sebab pegang fon sepanjang show.
thanks nnt aku blanja

Lagu ni nama dia "Sweet Mistake" . lagu aku tulis, lyrics pun sama. aku suka lagu ni. simple yet comel. mcm Hey Monday!
Lyrics dia cerita pasal

Lagu ni pulak, nama dia "Letting You Go". Ni first ever song yg aku tulis untuk band Hello.
and first lyrics aku try tulis dan juga first melodi aku cari untuk lagu sendiri.

kalau nak tgk lagi, masuk youtube saya
visit band Hello, is this the band?

skrg kami sudah habis show! wooyeah.
nak recording untuk album. tp skrg tgh xm dan final.
tsk.
tggu lg seminggu

tolong!

2009-05-15T19:27:00.001+08:00

hello visitors

tolong bagi aku kaya

click banner > kat sebelah kanan ni.

atau tolong donate dkt Paypal aku.

thanks!

MAY1, mayday mayday

2009-05-01T06:46:00.005+08:00

hey it's Labour Day, meaning.
a Global-no-work day (for 85%) people in the world. including me, yay!

means, no work for ID today. no no.
ID means = Interface Design.
Interface Design = my Major in FCM
FCM = Faculty of Creative Multimedia @ MMU.

(BM pulak)

kalau tengok kalendar, ada lg 2 minggu untuk semester ni tamat. dan ada 4 minggu lg untuk portfolio show. voilah! mmg best.
semua benda adalah baik skrg, yg tak baik nya, kena keluarkan idea baru untuk gadget ID. (di-luar-kotak) kata Encik Khong. waduh.
takpa, janji tak kena bar, dan ada harapan untuk pass sem ni.

habis sem ni, ada lg 7 subjek universiti untuk diambil. (tsk patut 6)

Cyberpreneurship (baru drop haritu), Islamic Studies, Co-curiculum, BHM, MCI Internet Application, Media Aesthetic dan satu subjek minor ID.

(sapa2 yg nak join aku nxt2 sem, mari habiskan!)

cerita universiti tamat.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

sekarang nak cerita pasal muzik pulak.

oh, esok (2may), aku akan bertolak ke ipoh bersama band ku Hello, is this the band? (or well known as Hello!) untuk bermain satu lagi show besar tahun ini, A Core Festival 3 , dibawakan oleh Glendora Records. Banyak band ban dhebat mcm Love Me Butch, Incarnation, Love As Arson and many more. Aku rasa Hello! saja band yg lembut dan tak jerit kat festival ni.

daripada informasi yg aku terima, show ni dilangsungkan di Dewan Sekolah Cina Yuk Choy, Ipoh. dua stage akan dibuat, satu dalam dewan, satu kat belakang. mesti best punya lah.
Tapi untuk budak "inDIE", festival ni takda band "indie", tapi kalau korang paham ape tu "indie" bole la datang jugak. (ipoh kan power inDIE ni).

------------

Sebut pasal "INDIE", aku nak cerita sikit pasal INDIE ni.
(aku tulis mengikut pandangan dan pendapat aku sendiri)

kalau ikut term in Wikipedia ,

In popular music, independent music, often abbreviated as indie, is a term used to describe independence from major commercial record labels and an autonomous, do-it-yourself approach to recording and publishing.

so, dalam bahasa melayu nya, Indie ini adalah terma yg digunakan oleh industri muzik arus perdana (mainstream) ie; Siti Nurhaliza, M Nasir, Sony Music, ke atas industri muzik yg dijalankan sendiri, oleh artis/band itu sendiri. dari segi penulisan muzik, lirik, rakaman, distribusi dan penjualan.

Band-band indie, adalah semua band yg korang nampak keluar kat flyers gig, shows, tak kira hardcore, metal, slow, melayu semua.

her's and mine's, purrfect!

2009-04-26T03:10:00.004+08:00

twenty-five

2009-04-26T00:56:00.004+08:00

im twenty-five today!
horrayy!...

..

ucapan ..

firstly i would like to thanks SOO MUCH to my Avril for that unexpected suprise birthday party. ( i thought i cant be punkd, or suprise, you're GOOD!)
thank you for the lovely sling bag, the card, and the wallet (walaupun making me feel tua, but its okay, i am d: ) allthough i still wish for other presents d: d: d:

thanks for the pepsay, pizza, the cheese cake! im probably still eating the cheesecake while writing this.

thanks to Im for helping her out, thanks also for Hidhir for making it happened!

and thanks to my bandmates, Boy, jibin, Dy, hidhir, for the PRACTICE-BEFORE-IPOH session.
i got serveddd mann! hahaha.
thanks for the lovely BIG card, man..those cartoons are cutee Dy!

thanks you guys for the small room-party. also to Adam Frasa for coming with Dy!

shiz, i never had a birthday party or suprise birthday party before.
i never celebrate my birthday before.
i never celebrate my birthday with my LOVER before.
plus, i never received a birthday wish from my father before. he texted me at 12:09AM last night .. speechless.

thanks everyone who texted me for wishes, thanks everyone that wish me at facebook (darn lupa tukar)

well, Avril, i will never forget my 25th birthday! thanks DARLING SOO MUCH I LOVE YOU SOO MUCH MWA MWA MWA MWA WMA MWA MWA TAPAT.. (hehehehe)

if i die tomrow, i wont regret anything , i had a good life, good people, and good lover.
i only regret i wouldnt be able to make them happy anymore.
whoa, but i wont die tmrrow, we dont know that, cheers!

-------

well, 25 marked the age-of-no-turning back for me.
i mean, in 5 years from now, i will be in the state of life making.
everything i do from now on, will lead to my future.
i will be teenager again, i will be a boy, a kid, a man, a grown up man, within this 5 years.

mark my word i will use this 5 years more than the years i had lived.

God has plans for me, but i have plans for myself too.

within nxt 5 years, these are my plans

- finish my study
- get a job/ or start a biznees that will make money for me
- start my record label, make Hello as big as i can, sign other bands!
- start my own magazine
- get a house, a scooter, a jet-ski.
- travels travels travels.
.
.
.
.
..
.
- get married to my Avril! wohoo
ehehehe mwa mwa!

im leaving to ipoh tomorow for Wuhuu09, till then. i love you all
i love YOU farah shasheera rosli soo muchhh!

p/s ; regrets of not doing things, not of what u done

RAINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN BOOWWWWWWWWWWSSSSZZZZZZ! MWA MWA

2009-04-12T12:29:00.008+08:00

hey guys!
im back, whts up?

hmm, well its 12:30 sunday afternoon, its cloudy, with blue sky, what a nice weather .
i woke up at 10+ this morning, feeling worried.
well, there's so much things to do in so lil time.

what im going to do?

- ID FYP ASS, screen design and icons! (MAJOR!)

- t-shirt design for Hello.
- EP cover design for Hello.
- buy t-shirt for Hello
- print t-shirt for Hello

all these due by 18th, im going to penang.

well, lets update something here.

I got my Squier Telecaster Custom! at last.
and now, Baby Star has a boyfriend! hehe

Right now, me and the band (hello, is this the band?) is on show rows, what i prefer to call as weekends tour. dates are:

KL - April 11 (Done)
Penang - April 18
Ipoh - April 26
Ipoh - May 2

so if any of you readers around these city, catch us okay!
visit us at www.myspace.com/helloisthistheband

we're currently working on our upcoming album.
currently done with 6 songs, 2 more songs coming plus 2 acoustic version.
meaning there'll be 10songs inside da cd.

well, i prefer photo-based cover rather than graphic cover. what do you think?
here's a 30seconds design of the album's cover (just a concept) , of what i think in my mind.

and the title of the album is "YOU HAD ME AT HELLO"
it's a title from a song inside the album. and its gooood!

and by the way, i just designed a T-Shirt for Hello, so tell me what you think !

it'll be print and on sale this 18th april!

these passed weeks has been a hectic and discovering weeks.

i never love somebody really really much with all my heart. but i do love her that much!! (see photo above)
jom jalan jalan jalan jalan!

I LOVE YOU SOOO MUCHHH DARLLLLLLLLL

well, there's plenty of things i did over passed weeks, with my avril, but i dont wanna update here. its my life, and there's too many stalkers and weirdos and psychos in da NET, so find out yourself okay?

to any girls reading this now, i suggest you to DELETE whoever you DONT KNOW in your facebook, myspace, fster,and whatever, make yourself private online!

i know some of you dont like this, but trust me, there are MANY EVIL and BAD and CRUEL men out there, more than GOOD men. take care of yourself. please.

well guys, if you guys in around KL, and dont have anything to do on Saturday, come down to Paul's Place in Jalan Klang Lama, to watch "A SHOW FULL OF FRESH BANDS!"
Adrenaline Rush.

Support everyband on the bill ESPECIALLY my avri's Rain Bows!

(but i still hope you can follow me to Penang ); )

that's all for now.

chiodos!

dedicated, devoted.

2009-03-22T07:03:00.003+08:00

its 7:03AM Sunday morning.

i just finished my study my avril's problem, and ive learned and understand about the problem very well.

so now i understand better, and know what i should do.

starting from today, I will devote, and dedicate myself to take care of my avril.
because i love her so much, seeing you smile and laugh is all i need darling (;
not because you're sick, because i love you.
i have health problems too. and you should take care of me too d:

well sayang, what ever happened, it wont change anything.
i still love you, i still like you, like the first time we met.

its gonna be a tough week for us.
i love you so much farah shasheera! mwaaaaaaaa !

i slalu blog time u tido kan? hehehehe

nobodyreadsmyblog.

josh.

Say NO to Rapidshare, Megaupload, Netload, no to Rapidshare, Megaupload, Netload, Cumload or whtever the hell it is!

2009-03-21T13:20:00.005+08:00

let me teach you somthing about the internet.

you can get something good, and not paying anything.
you like to download? games/tvs/movies/pRon/ anything?

for example. you wanna download something from Rapidshare, or Megaupload, yes they have free service, but it so fucking slow. you have to pay like RM30/month to get fast connection. okay, you buy an account at Rapidshare, how bout Megaupload? Netload? or others? you wanna pay RM200/months for this?

no f-way.
so let me teach you a lesson, on how to get your fast download, for free.

what you need?

1. A local-based webserver (means this server located in Malaysia, because when u download something from LOCAL server, it will be super-fast!)

you can buy a 3GB or 10GB webserver, with a 10GB transfer per month for RM145 Per year!
you can find them on the internet, but contact me if you need advise.

2. RAPIDLEECH PLUGMOD's script.

RapidleechPlugMod_rev.36_by_eqbal.zip

(megaupload plugin maybe not working, you can find the plugin and update it. go here http://rlmonitor.info/rlplugin.php )

installation?
its easy. unzip it. upload the folder to your server. and run it !

for example www.yourserver.com/rapidleech

how it works?

simple. this genious Rapidleech script will transload the files from Rapidshare/Megaupload/ etc file to your server. you will be suprised how fast the connections of these servers

here's some screen shot if you think im bluffing you (LOL)

and i use Orbit Download to download my file from My Webserver

Do you see the speed?

sometimes you can get 300kb/sec if your webserver in full speed.

walla.

say no to them

say yes to free.

so, why not invest some money to save them more?

oh shit, still want it free??

okay okay, you guys sucks!

go here http://rlmonitor.info/

there's bunch of updated RL servers there. but u wont get as freedom and as fast as your own LOCAL webserver!

if you need more help on this, let me know,
hit the comments !

im kev, til nxt time you idiots!

4:28 night, 31/31/31

2009-03-17T04:27:00.003+08:00

i cant sleep right now
even tho i woke up at 9 yesteday, but yes still cant.

there's a lot of things going in my mind right now.
i need someone to talk to, but my avril is sleeping (kena marah sebab kacau dia tido ); ).
i hate this, waking up in the middle of night. i wish i can call my avril, and talk to her til morning.

i am happy right now, with what i have, people around me, my lovely girlfriend.
but, i am scared. i am scared right now, its 4:35AM.

im not scared of dying. im not scared of anything. im just scared of losing the one that i love so much. i was alone. if so, i will be alone again.

its been 31days. and i know it will be 31weeks, 31 months, and another 31years. dont change darling, even a bit. u knw wht i mean.

forgive me for my wrongs, forgive me for my words, if i did.

pls get well soon darling. Take my heart, take my blood, take my bone, take my life, if its needed. i live for nothing before, now i live for you.

i gotta take care of someone. she's not feeling well.

i love you.
4:43am,

out.

yeay

2009-03-16T03:44:00.000+08:00

my avril sudah sihat!

seronoknya.

finally, the wish list

2009-03-06T11:40:00.002+08:00

2009's wish list
oh, my avril hv asked my like 100 times to write this.
so here we go!

1. my avril
2. my avril
3. avril
4. my avril again (hehe)
5. new nice pair of jeans
6. a new set of t-shirts (im selling or giving away my old shirts, including band shirts and others)
7. new pair of shoes (no more asics)
8. Fender Telecaster Deluxe

or this (Squier Telecaster Custom)

9. a Laptop
10. EP of my band.
11. new "reliable" wrist watch.
12. new wallet
13. my promised beach (14)
14. an evening with my avril by the beach.
15. a good acoustic guitar (i love to write song with this)
16. a small digital camera ( i dont wanna carry SLR around)
17. me and her health (cancel everything above except 1-4, if it is needed for this)

hmm lupa la. nnt update lg okay?
muah

friday

2009-03-06T11:28:00.002+08:00

its friday.

i need to regain my energy and my power back.

next week is week 6 of 14 week study.
i need to finish my assignment, and other things

things are going well now. im bck on my feet again.
thanks darling for taking care of me.

got my hair cut yesterday, and i look silly.
well its normal, i never got a good haircut.
lets wait for another week or two.

get well soon! i wanna see your smile

hey monday

2009-03-04T19:42:00.004+08:00

oh hey reader!

its been awhile since my last post.
well, its been a rough weeks for me, i got sick, i mentally sick of my study, and insanely in love with someone.
played a show in Penang last 21st, and this coming 7th at One Cafe, KL. and after im gonna play another big show, The Upstairs live at Modesto's on 15th March. on 21st March i have date. jgn kacau.

not much i wanna write here now, but this post is for you my avril.

dont let things in your life gets your down. its okay to feel down sometimes, but dont let it eat you okay? get back on your feet and cheer up.
i totally understand what you're feeling right now, i cant help much but you have my support.remember that.

tidur puas puas, esok pg kelas (:
lepas tu kita pergi potong rambut okay?

i love you sayang!

v-day

2009-02-15T21:25:00.003+08:00

oh well, its vday yesterday.
it was awesome
i had a all night long chat with special someone, and went breakfast that morning.
went to gig that afternoon, play the show by evening, spent the whole show with my love one.
hangout at pizza hut wangsa maju and makan byk gila.
and at 10:05 i officially proposed to her and avril is mine now (:
a tired drive-back home and a good night sleep.

what a day i wont forget.
(:

happy vday darl!

last

2009-02-09T13:50:00.002+08:00

..might be it, or might be the last.
i know my destiny.

whatever it is, i'll take it and just listen to this song.

Nine In The Afternoon
by Panic At The Disco

Back to the street where we began
Feeling as good as lovers can, you know
Now we're feeling so good

Pickin up things we shouldn't read
It looks like the end of history as we know
It's just the end of the world

Back to the street where we began
Feeling as good as love, you could, you can

Into a place where thoughts can bloom
Into a room where it's nine in the afternoon
And we know that it could be
And we know that it should
And you know that you feel it too
'Cause it's nine in the afternoon

And your eyes are the size of the moon
You could 'cause you can so you do
We're feeling so good
just the way that we do
When it's nine in the afternoon

Your eyes are the size of the moon
You could 'cause you can so you do
We're feeling so good

Back to the street
Down to our feet
Losing the feeling of feeling unique
Do you know what I mean?

Back to the place
Where we used to say
Man it feels good to feel this way
Now I know what I mean

Back to the street, back to the place,
Back to the room where it all began, hey
Back to the room where it all began
'Cause it's nine in the afternoon

Your eyes are the size of the moon
You could 'cause you can so you do
We're feeling so good
Just the way that we do
When it's nine in the afternoon

hey guys!

2009-02-09T11:00:00.002+08:00

just for updates,

currently BUSY working on my Final Year Project (FYP), and busy with my band, Hello, is this the band? and most importantly, busy with my avril.

yes, my own avril ♡

will be back guys!

i miss my avril

2009-02-01T11:43:00.002+08:00

hey peeps,
i just got back from ipoh, with my band Hello, is this the band?
we played our first show yesterday, opening for a great event, Indie Day Out Fest 2.
it was awesome! awesome crowds, awesome place, awesome town, awesome friends, awesome bands.
and no words can describe how much i enjoy playing yesterday. its the biggest crowds i ever play in my life.
but as usual, here and there, there are always mistakes. but no worries, it'll be patched! i'll improve and so do we (the band)

and its sunday now, damn. class starting tomorrow.

and im missing my avril so much.

josh love avril

muah!

how much

2008-12-25T00:40:00.002+08:00

how much it cost you to make other people smile?
10 ringgit? 10 litres of petrol?
a call? an sms?

thnk abt it

Lucky Number 7

2008-12-21T17:34:00.002+08:00

(do me a favor please, download this song wait for it and listen to it while you read this post :)

next year is already 2009,
well that means, i've been 7 years in university education. lucky number 7 ayy?

yes its true, i enrolled to this magnificent uni, back in 2002. ( i think i've already wrote bout this, but hey, who cares?)
it was back in 2002, a year after i finished my secondary school, or what they call "high schoool". honestly, i never really wanted to go anywhere. mmu was my choice.
i still remember, back in september 2002, first day im in mmu. i was so excited to be there. my plan was easy, get to know as much great people as i can, experience the life, and lastly, get a degree. i was at multimedia university , in melaka back then. taking a diploma in Business information system. well, that isnt what i wanna do. so a semester after that, i joined the EEP (early entrance programme), and then moved to MMU Cyberjaya, to join the faculty of creative multimedia, taking a degree.

and that was 2002, and boom! next year its gonna be 2009, 7 lucky years.
for that long period of me being in this university, i dont think i had enough of it - getting to know new people, old people, lecturers, friends, all the sweat and tears.

and people, repeatedly asking me "bila nak grad?" .

honestly, i dont know how to answer that, and give a good answer that they can chew em up. i hope by giving these answer, you guys can properly understand it and not ask about it anymore.

the answer:
financially, i not in the position that i can finish my studies in a short time.im self-sponsored, not by my parents, by myself. So i had to figure shit to find cash for my study, and my living. you'd probably wont understand this, so skip.

and for most part is, im not like most people. most people go to university , so they can get degree and probably land a good job after that. im not worry about what im gonna do after this, and i dont care if i ever get that scroll or not, what matter is the experience, the knowledge, the skills, the people, the things that ive met for my whole entire time here.

i might be here for another year, 2 years, 5 years, who knows? maybe but hey.
its not that i can just come back here when im 50 , and still be me now and do all the stuffs i like doing now.

im gonna be 25 next year, im still the person you knew back in 97, and will still be the same hopefully.

this post dedicated to everyone who still in university, struggling and striving everyday to achieve what they want to.

dont be too serious in life, or you will never get out alive

women

2008-12-17T13:19:00.004+08:00

i found something interesting, taken from a friend's blog entry long time ago.

isnt it? :b

things

2008-12-17T05:18:00.002+08:00

i got fascinated by things.
if i like it, i learn about it.
the more things i like, the more things i learn.
the more i learn, the richer i be.
yes i am rich.
i am rich of things inside my brain.

go learn things. read more books.
Not the kind of fancy books that you're reading.
learn your history, learn your own history.
if Nicola Tesla does not ring any bells to you,
go to google and find out what he invented that are so important to you.
then you'll know what kind of education that you're having right now..

this goes to everyone , in any educational institution right now.

sakit

2008-12-15T18:55:00.002+08:00

oh,
aku baru saja terjaga dari tidur, erm bukan tidur sbenarnya, tapi tidur sebab sakit yg amat, migrain+ demam+loya+ apa saja lah.
skrg feeling a bit better, sudah 5 hari sakit, well. kerja pun apa tak buat.
kenapa at this time every year aku akan sakit. last year sakit teruk jugak.
almost 2 weeks tak bole buat apa apa. backpain yg teruk. nak tidur tak bole, nak duduk tak bole, kena berdiri. tu pun tak bole lama.
hmm
a week before this pun aku sakit jugak. tapi disclosed sakit apa. dan semua ni membuatkan aku berfikir, sejauh mana kita akan sihat, sampai kita sakit. sakit dan tak bole buat apa apa.
bagi org yang selalu endurance sakit mcm aku ni, mungkin paham sikit2 betapa nikmat nya bangun hari hari sihat walafiat.

gunakanlah kesihatan anda, untuk menjenguk mak bapak, kerja baik baik, hulur duit kat depa, adik2 , jgn dok beli dadah ka apa, jenguk la kawan2, kawan2 lama, kawan2 skolah, apa sangat nak saving duit tu.
takkan nak tunggu kawan2 sakit baru nak melawat? atau tunggu anda sendiri sakit, baru depa mai melawat? tah mai ka tah dak ka.

ini la yg aku byk rasakan sekarang. kawan2 aku byk caught up dengan kerja masing, aku tau busy. tak tak busy mcm President america pun. terlalu sangat mengejar duit dan awek, sampai takmau lepak dgn kawan2. alasan : "busy la weh, kerja design.."
fakof la wei, aku pernah kerja jugak. lagi lama daripada hampa semua kerja.

sorry terkasar bahasa.

aku bukan apa, latih la diri hampa untuk kurangkan "busy" tu.
skrg, tak kawin, tak apa, dah busy teruk.
cuba bayang kalau dah kawin?

peace yaw

hmm

2008-12-14T17:33:00.001+08:00

well,
i wanna wrap up my 2008 soon. i'll write em all
its gonna be ... whoa!

lets wait

the WWW and internet and WEB!

2008-12-10T23:23:00.004+08:00

yerp, selamat hari raya aidiladha to everyone! (that still read this blog)

oh well, im no fancy blogger with fancy stories. i prefer not to write it here if i can.
im still olskool - meet people outside and lets talk til morning.
oh, speakign about that, i miss that.

i mean, look at us. what has the internet done to us?
lets reverse back to my time, back in 1996, when internet is just new . jaring brought it to malaysia.

i was in standard 6, there was no internet. no mp3s, no social networking site, no napster, no google, chatting, no ym, no whatsoever. the only medium you can use, is home phone ! yeah bebeh, getting the trouble of calling the person at home, and sometimes u gotta go tru few "firewalls" . hahaha, what i mean, their parents, sisters or whatever !

well i miss that. for those who dont owns home phone, we hav to go to their house and shout their name. ahahha

you know why i miss all that and i hates internet so much?
yes its true, internet give the endless opportunities to keep in touch with your friends, and to get to know new friends. i admit it, since i plug myself into the internet, ive got myself so many friends from it.

but why its bad?

because, for example, A and B live in the same town, they always chatting together, read each other's blog or do the social-networking thingy. they will just chat and chat, because its "easier" and "simpler", and you can keep your fat up your ass more!

people became so lazy ! A and B wont have that excitement of meeting and hanging out with each other anymore. you chat and do so many stuffs on the net, and you have less and less things to tell each other. think about a situation, when you're somewhere like at the airport, and u meet a friend that u havent meet for like 3 years!

think about it. its about human interactions and socialization .
its getting lesser, and lesser each day. i've seen this. its getting bad. people spent too much time on the internet, you'd probably miss out so many things out there.
ive been there, and done that. and i see people still get hype on things like facebook. its pure eeevil . its a tool. tool of the unknown .

let me tell you what i think about this, and why im spending my time writing this thing.
lets go through the internet timeframe in malaysia first.

1996 - internet first available to public, via Jaring
1997 - IRC is getting hot and hotter! another reason why you should learn to use internet
1998 - popular mIRC clients was available on almost every PC you can find!
1998 - CyberCafe grew like mushrooms ! rapidly opened everywhere
1999 - the WWW is getting hotter, no social network website available yet. people start to write their own web log. or as known as BLOG today. community sites like circles99 and communityzero rapidly growing
2000 - The golden era of IRC ! i was a part of this.
2001 - After almost 7 years, IRC was doomed ! servers blocked malaysian users, people getting bored. almost 70% left IRC. by this time, people just use internet not more than 1 hour everyday
2002 - The Dawn of SOCIAL Networking! Friendster was available to public ! people so caught up with the "testimonial" thingy, and internet became hot again. people spent sooo much time on this.
2003 - Myspace was born! - i dont have to say much about this. now they have like millions of users registered. my id number was 666306, try to figure out whats yours and compare to my number (:
2004 - FREE blogging websites available. blogger, fotopages, and many more! people dont have to buy their own webspace for blog anymore.
2005 - email getting bigger and bigger!Flickr, fotopages was born.
2006 - everybody will have at least a SITE on the internet.
2007 - Facebook was born! and people get hype for their web2.0 interface, shameful.
2008 - the facebook era, photo tagging, tag.
2009 -??

try to think, how much time you've spent within this period of time. and how much time you wasted, and how much time you spent wisely.

please people,
computer isnt your home, internet isnt your world. you've got soul youve got body, go out to the real world.
its lame to spend half of your day on facebook, doing that "post" thign and whtever.
ITS LAME MOFO.

THIS BLOG IS DEDICATED TO PEOPLE WHO SPEND 14 HOURS OF THEIR DAY ON FACEBOOK, PLAY THAT STPD FLASH GAMES. come on guys, go out and have fun

- tidak ditujukan kepada sesiapa! jgn offended ya ( :

Ramadhan and Hari Raya

2008-10-11T13:48:00.002+08:00

firstly, to anyone reading my blog,
i would like to wish you Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Fitri Maaf Zahir dan Batin , i meant it.

well, i didn't write anything the whole puasa, probably due to my serabutness of life and i dont have anything to write.
but i'll write something soon.

hmm my raya wasnt a great raya this year,
maybe the expectation that i hope , never happened.
but still its a good raya, with good brothers at home and friends, met long lost classmates, hanging out, barbequeing and so many stuffs.

well i'll post something soon, dont have time right now.
im packing and going back to kedah for a special mission.

welcome Sheera to my blog. thanks for reading darling.

made of honor

2008-08-28T13:23:00.001+08:00

its 5:02 am ,
i just watched a movie, Made of Honor , starring patrick dempsey and michelle monaghan.
a good movie, but a bit corny.

well, the movie made me realized something, choice.
choice about our life, who'd u be with, u marry with and live with.
dont marry a guy/girl just because u wanna get married. marry them because you love them all your heart, and willing to give and take everything, for the rest of your life, without a doubt or string attached.

its probably the right time for watching it, considering what im feeling right now.

i feel stupid, and tired. mostly tired.
im tired of being nice to others, being a nice guy, nice friend, or being nice in everything.

for the last 2 months, i've said to myself, to be nice, and be a good guy. give her a chance.
but i dont think i can handle this anymore.
its probably me, not her.

i know im not a master in relationship whatsoeva, but i know, basic rule in relationship is , you gotta be there whenever your partner needs you, whatever you do.

she made me realized that, i dont really need her. (i hope she can prove that im wrong after this)
and she also doesnt really needs me. well, she needs me when she needs help.yea she'll call and sms or msg so many many times, but hey i dont mind.
i'll answer them as good as i can, even if im falling from a plane or dying from a car crash.

i wont let my partner down. and even if i cant answer it, i'll do my best to answer it later.

but, when i need her, when i call her, mostly when she's into something or went somewhere,
she'll say she's busy. busy , busy.
and if i call more than 3 times, she'll ask me to chill out?
and she'll say that im a pushy. can u believe it?

i know nobody read this blog, not even her. she wouldn't care much .
i think i should probably go back and be me again, as what i were before. as cold as stone. heartless.

i dont need anyone, that only needs me whenever she wanted.
if somebody waited for me , on my birthday night, in front of my house, with a cake, i would cry, and wont ask for anything else.

all these while, you said that i only sees your fault, not your kindness, but i think you're the one that doing it.

i hope you're happy and enjoy with your life now.
ignore what ive wrote (if you're reading this) . and continue to neglect me.
you dont need me.

im just writing what i felt. im sorry.

untitled

2008-08-08T13:15:00.002+08:00

untitled.

is it wrong for me to ask,
is it wrong for me to care,
sometimes i just wanna share.

maybe you dont understand
how hard to be me
try to live in this shoes for a day
but i dont want you to feel that way

when you only have yourself
and nobody else
when your parents cant really help
and others are not really here

maybe,
the others leave me,
i hope you are not them
because i know you arent

is it wrong for me to ask,
is it wrong for me to care,
so if you dont want me to share
i'll understand

i will keep all inside this hollow heart
and hoping i can carry them through
until my time is up
they'll be buried inside with me

and when im gone that day
dont you worry about me
and dont be sorry,
my ma will be there
she would be listening to me everyday

until that day
time is not enough
for me to explain
why

im a loner child
was born alone
raised myself up
i will live, and keep living
until this over, be strong

is it wrong for me to ask,
is it wrong for me to care,
sometimes i just wanna share.

-fahmy, 1:31 PM 08 aug 08

Third Eye Blind - Deep Inside of You

2008-08-02T23:06:00.001+08:00

life

2008-07-26T18:17:00.002+08:00

this one, is a dialog taken from a UK tv series Hustle, Danny Blue talking to Willie on rooftop

Willie : you wanna be regular people? hmm? do ya? well go ahead, go on.
They're crying out for footsoldiers down there.
Go and have your life run by bosses, bank managers and politicians, but if you wanna be a grifter, dont have anything in life you cant walk away from in a second.
Lovers friends, even your own mother.

exactly what ive been thinking.

( :

2008-07-17T11:31:00.000+08:00

( :

Michele Branch - Goodbye To You

2008-07-17T11:26:00.001+08:00

Of all the things I've believed in,
I just want to get it over with,
tears form behind my eyes,
but I do not cry,
counting the days that pass me by.

I've been searchin' deep down in my soul;
words that I'm hearin' are starting to get old,
it feels like I'm starting all over again,
The last three years were just pretend,
and I said...

Goodbye to you,
goodbye to everything I thought I knew,
You were the one I loved,
the one thing that I tried to hold onto.

I still get lost in your eyes,
and it seems that I can't live a day without you,
closing my eyes,
and you chase my thoughts away,
to a place where I am blinded by the light,
but it's not right.

Goodbye to you,
goodbye to everything I thought I knew,
You were the one I loved,
the one thing that I tried to hold on to.

Ooh whoa....
and it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time,
I want what's yours and I want what's mine,
I want you,
but I'm not giving in this time.

Goodbye to you,
goodbye to everything I thought I knew,
You were the one I loved,
the one thing that I tried to hold onto
Goodbye to you, (goodbye to you)
goodbye to everything I thought I knew, (goodbye to you)
You were the one I loved,
the one thing that I tried to hold onto,
(the one thing that i tried to hold onto)
the one thing that I tried to hold onto.
(the one thing that i tried to hold onto)

Oh, oh whoa, oh, oh (one thing that i tried to hold onto)
and when the stars fall I will lie awake,
you're my shooting star.

Miley Cyrus - 7 Things!

2008-07-17T08:20:00.002+08:00

Miley Cyrus - 7 Things Lyrics

Miley Cyrus Lyrics

I probably shouldn't say this
But at times I get so scared
When I think about the previous
Relationship we shared

It was awesome, but we lost it
It's not possible for me, not to care
And now we're standing in the rain
But nothing's ever gonna change until you hear, my dear

The 7 things I hate about you
The 7 things I hate about you, oh you
You're vain, your games, you're insecure
You love me, you like her
You make me laugh, you make me cry
I don't know which side to buy
Your friends, they're jerks
When you act like them, just know it hurts
I wanna be with the one I know
And the 7th thing I hate the most that you do
You make me love you

It's awkward and it's silent
As I wait for you to say
What I need to hear now
Your sincere apology
When you mean it, I'll believe it
If you text it, I'll delete it
Let's be clear
Oh I'm not coming back
You're taking 7 steps here

The 7 things I hate about you
You're vain, your games, you're insecure
You love me, you like her
You make me laugh, you make me cry
I don't know which side to buy
Your friends, they're jerks
When you act like them, just know it hurts
I wanna be with the one I know
And the 7th thing I hate the most that you do
You make me love you

And compared to all the great things
That would take too long to write
I probably should mention
The 7 that I like

The 7 things I like about you
Your hair, your eyes, your old Levi's
When we kiss I'm hypnotized
You make me laugh, you make me cry
But I guess that's both I'll have to buy
Your hands in mine
When we're intertwined, everything's alright
I wanna be with the one I know
And the 7th thing I like most that you do
You make me love you
You do

wondering..

2008-07-17T06:06:00.004+08:00

i am wondering right now,
who reads my blog?
answer - people and robots! you fool!
(robot is the google robot that crawling across the web to find you!)

blog for the day

2008-07-17T05:55:00.002+08:00

well, its 7:49 am and i still cant sleep.
and i think its time to write something.

i wanna share something with you today, i heard this somewhere, but i couldn't
remember it. -
"a person that you know your whole life, doesnt mean he/she is your friend. you just knew them.and it doesnt have to take years to find a real friend"

do you agree with this?

hmm, i wanna tell you about the people that i knew my whole life.

they're divided into few groups -
my childhood and yet still friend, my school friends, my classmates, my uni friends, and others.

i love every piece of them, yeah i do.
my childhood friends always there for me, we always hangout, stupid jokes, old jokes. we would talk about our dreams, girls. school. the bad things we did together.

my schoolfriends are the majority, mostly guys. i never been into mixed school, except kindergarten and the stupid mrsm (that i rolled for a month lol)

and yeah, my classmates are the best people in my life ! i wont forget the name like jai, shah , faiz , broz, pali, anaih, leman , emon, and others! (i dont forget you guys, just malas nak type hehe)

my uni friends! i learned alot from these groups!

but now i wanna write about the "other" group.hmm u might be wondering who they are.
they are the people who i knew by doing something , joining something, or i knew them from other people.
it sounds insignificantly in this story, but it is.
i spent few years back with them. doing stuffs.
i wasted so much time with them.
they are the most talented arrogant people i ever know. i never regretted what ive done to them. . but im done with them.
like i said earlier before, maybe i know them quite long and good, but the truth is,they're never my friends.
friends will never leave friends. but they did. so they arent one :b

allright, so you might now guessing who are these people, or thinking are you the one that ive been writing about. well, the answer is NO.

well, think about it ! well peace out !

Train - Get To Me

2008-07-05T04:49:00.002+08:00

I love this song so much. it gives me some kind of good feeling and i feeeeel so good everytime i listen to this. great lyrics tho
its from Train.

Well an airplane's faster than a Cadillac
And a whole lot smoother than a camel's back
But I don't care how you get to me
Just get to me
Parasail or first class mail
Get on the back of a Nightingale
Just get to me I don't care just get to me
Prokeds, mopeds take a limousine instead
They ain't cheap but they're easy to find
Get on the highway point yourself my way
Take a roller coaster that comes in sideways
Just get to me - yeah

Go on hitch a ride on the back
of a butterfly
There's no better way to fly
To get to me
I look around at what I got
And without you, it ain't a lot
But I got every, with you, everything

Maybe you could pollinate over the
Golden Gate
Take a left hand turn at the corner
Of Haight
And then a sharp right
At the first street light
And get yourself on a motor bike
And if you think you'll get stuck in a
traffic jam
That's fine, send yourself through a telephone line
It doesn't matter how you get to me
Just get to me

Cause after every day
The wind blows the night time my way
And I imagine that you are
Above me like a star
And you keep on glowing
And you keep on showing me the way
SHINE SHINE SHINE

Sara Bareilles !

2008-05-12T22:30:00.002+08:00

Yeah,
im doing my first album review wohoo!

okay,
while writing this down, im still listening to her album for my first time.
but, Love Song has been on radio and tv every hours here and there now,and thats why i'd like to listen to her whole album and give my opinion abt it.

well, the Love Song is really a catchy and great songwriting by Sara, and i think i enjoyed it so much the first time i heard it on tv. Well, i always love pop rock/pop singer-songwriter-chicks who play instrument(s) like Michele Branch, KT Tunstall, Venesa Carlton, and im looking forward to hear more from Sara.

Her song One Sweet Love really unveiled her voices, and also a great song. Kinda like, Michele Branch type song. love it. Also take a listen to Between The Lines , City, Many The Lines, and Gravity.

No doubt that Sara Bareilles got a great voice and good songwriting skills.
Well, i hope she's not just going to be happy with her first album, im looking forward for her next material in future.

download it here (: , but dont forget to buy them if you like em

http://rapidshare.com/files/90222149/Sara_Bareilles_-_Little_Voices.zip

Van Wilder, at last.

2008-05-06T19:29:00.002+08:00

well, at last , today, ive finally watched Van Wilder the movie.
yeah, the movie was out in 2002 and i watched it 6 years later.
van wilder got out from his college that year, and yeah, i was enrolled in my uni in the same year.
well, few people event requested me to watch that movie, when they knew that i am somehow, in my 6th of year uni.
yeah!
but im not considering myself as the van wilder. he's way too cool than me.
well, its a great movie, with great lines in it. and the movie is pretty much of what i think my life is.

(scene where ryan reynolds (van wilder) and tara reid sit after they had hockey game)

ryan : so, how long have you and premed richard been together?
tara : since my freshmen year
ryan : i bet he's a tight whitey guy (LOL , this one really hahah)
tara : excuse me?
ryan : white, elastic band, constrictive. You can tell a lot about a person by the kind of drawers they wear.
Like you, granny panties, i bet!
tara : Does that allude me to being the plain, boring type?
ryan : No, i just wanted a visual.
tara : i think it takes a lot more than the kind of underwear one wears to define them as a person
ryan : Like what?
tara : Like their action. For instance, most people want to get out of school, so they can make money. You're trying to make money to stay in school. why?
ryan : I like it here
tara : what about your future?
ryan : you take life way too seriously
tara : life is serious
ryan : you know, i used to party with this guy who told me "van, Dont take life too seriously, you'll never get out alive" .
He used to write for the school paper. He kept babbling about the differences between light and dark beer. very strange, but good advice.
You think about the future too much, you kind forget about the present, obviously.
And i am really enjoying the present right now, sharing a penalty box and a tri-latte with Gwen Pearson, who believes cencorship reflects society's lack of confidence in itself.

well, he's true i guess.
and i believe many of my friends, and students now in colleges and unis is striving their best to get out of their place, and go to the what they call "real world". real world of what they define as go to work at a company, get paid every month, pay bills, get married and have children.
but, most of them kinda forget, of what they're doing here.

they forget to enjoy themselves, they take drugs too much til they dont even stand on this earth, they study so hard til they forget to go out and have fun, they're too afraid of what their parents will say, til they left out so many things that they can do in uni, they're in love so damn much with their girlfriends til they missed out their friends and so many things.

hey guys, i know ive been here long than what im supposed to, i have my reasons.
and im not telling all these just to tell you to extend your studies, no.
what im trying to say is, you just have 4 or 5 years in your precious life to enjoy this.
and you will work for another 40 years and get married for the whole life, and you wont be getting it back when you're 40. or 60. it wont happened again.

to freshmen, let your next 4 years gonna be the greatest time on your life, and to anyone finishing soon, enjoy your last moment here, go out party with your friends, ask your long-lost-contact friends to hangout, call your friends to have drinks with you.

im jepun, hafizi, fahmy, kev, kevin jeps ! out!

felt like writing.

2008-03-25T01:59:00.008+08:00

helo world.
how are u out there?
i dont know what to write, but im gonna give a shot.
well, howbout i tell you guys something .
about girls that i knew, before.
girls that really inspired me.
and most of em, gone now.

well, i kinda miss a girl i knew back in my schooldays.
i knew her accidently via irc , she thought im sombdoy else.
so we chat, and we met. that first met, omg,
she was soo beautiful. i felt for her.
since then, we always talked on the phone, irc-ing. everyday.
but, im nowhr around her heart. we were just friends.
but somhow after she finished school, she disappeared for a year,
it was my first year in uni. then i got her contact and we connected again.
but this time she was in kl, and has bf. i dont really mind. i always too late.
for everythg.
and then she was in love with my good friend. that was a sad time for me,
but im happy for them. but it dont last long.
and she disappeared again, and recently i heard,
she got married. );
she was my first crush.

and another girl is cinta.
i call her that because that's the only name i knew back then
when i was first year at uni.
well, she was a senior and she's damn hot.
i know she wasnt easy to get to know, so it took me half-a-year to get
to know her.
what's inspired me is she has the look and the brain. and we got somtgh
in common abt our mother.
she's a real good sister to her siblings.
and she's a good listener, good talker, and fun to hangout
even though back then, i speak POOR english (til now),
i still managed to speak english with her, LOL.
well, its been 4 years since the last time i met her.
she's engaged to smone now, and getting married soon.
i hope we can hangout for the last time (;

another one is za,
well, i kinda knew her since my alpha year in uni.
but we really got to know each other in 2005.
i like her , yeah i did.
but back then, she felt in love, again, with my good friend.
and again, im soooooo sad sad sad.
but in 2007, we got back together, but this time,
we really had feelings for each other.
shes a great friend and a good person to hangout.
she has a good taste in music, and tv too!
we used to sat and sang and play guitar together.
but, somehow i spoiled the relationship.
i kinda mis her, my friend.
i still remember she showing me around her old town, breakfast
together at her fav place.
well its all my fault. she's in a good place now.
i hope that we might be friend again.

another one is ...
well,
i dont know what to say abt her.
the most perfect girl i ever know.
but again, i spoiled it );
im so so so so sad.
if i have a chance to ride on a time machine
and get back in time,
i'd definitely repair this. this one.
that i cant really do anythg about it.

"of all the roses and apologies,
of all the sorry i asked,
i know daisy worth more to you,
i hope u'll forgive me,
even after im long gone from here"

to you, you know who you are.

i know nobody will read this.
but u know, somehow i felt like internet is like a treasure chest,
where we will dig and find something good in it.

til next time ya.

listening to SigurRos - Staralfur while writign this.

alive and kickin!

2008-02-12T15:10:00.000+08:00

yeah
im re-opening this thing.
you guys sucks!
thank you for visiting.
jeng!

bye

2007-10-29T08:01:00.000+08:00

bye, take care everyone!

kemaafan.

2007-10-01T12:05:00.000+08:00

dear kamu.
aku mahu meminta maaf atas kesalahan ku
walaupun ku asek mengulanginya
aku tak bermaksud hendak melukai hati mu
tapi hati ini tiada siapa yang tahu
cuma aku minta satu di bulan yang mulia ini
maafkan aku semaaf hati mu
buangkan segala selisih
kita pernah berkawan satu ketika dulu
dan selalu bertukar cerita
sedih dan gembira dan apa saja
walaupun kita bukan teman yang rapat
tapi kita sentiasa ada di sisi masing-masing
tapi sekarang kita tidak lagi
dan aku tahu kamu membaca tulisan ku ini
walaupun pada zahirnya kamu tidak mahu
jadi ingatlah saat saat kita menjadi kawan dahulu
sedih dan gembira dikongsi bersama
maafkan lah aku sekali lagi
kita cuba lari dari kenyataan
tapi kita tidak sedar akan realiti
cukup sudah aku kehilangan
aku harap kita tidak pernah berkawan
tetap menjadi asing
aku juga berharap
yang aku bangun suatu pagi
dan aku tidak lagi ada memori
dan aku tidak perlu lagi risau tentang apa apa
hanya bebas untuk terbang
aku,
banyak melukai hati lain
dan hati ini juga telah banyak dilukai
oleh insan insan yang aku tidak salahkan
kerana aku juga yang mencari
tapi aku tahu
tuhan juga yang menentukan
hidup, kawan, jodoh dan mati
sekeras mana kita cuba untuk mati
tapi jika bukan waktunya, kita tidak akan mati
dan sekeras mana kita cuba mendapatkan seseorang
jika bukan mereka yang ditakdirkan
kita juga tahu jawapan
aku tidak pernah memiliki kekasih
mereka datang dan pergi
seperti malam berganti siang
tidak pernah mereka singgah dan berhenti
dan apa bila mereka berhenti sekejap
Tuhan telah menulis
yang aku bukan dengan mereka
mungkin,
tuhan menghantar aku ke dunia ini
bukan untuk memilik kekasih
tapi untuk tujuan yang lain
aku hampir tiada apa apa
bonda juga telah pergi
ayahnda juga seperti tiada
hanya ada abang dan adik
yang masih mendaki mencari sesuatu
mungkin
mungkin
kerana apa yang aku mahu selama ini
melihat dunia lain di seberang sana
melakukan apa saja yang aku mahu
berjumpa dengan orang orang
tuhan telah memberi peluang itu
untuk melakukannya semua
dan selagi aku memiliki tubuh yang sihat
masih ada rezeki
aku bersyukur.
kerana ramai di luar sana yang saket
yang cacat yang tidak makan.
tidak pula mereka bersedih
dan mungkin
dengan tubuh yagn sihat ini
tuhan mahu aku menolong mereka
atau rakan rakan ku
atau keluarga ku.
sudah 23 tahun 5 bulan aku hidup
entah untuk berapa lama lagi
tapi jika ditakdirkan aku hanya hidup
untuk menulis ini kali terakhir
aku mahu lagi
meminta maaf sepenuh hati
maafkan lah diri ini
di bulan mulia ini.
dan lupakanlah aku sepenuhnya
teruskan hidup mu
dapatkan apa yang kamu mahu
dan mungkin akan kita ketemu suatu hari
aku bukan yang terbaik untukmu
kerana itu tuhan tentukan
aku juga tidak pernah terbaik buat sesiapa
selamat tinggal
ini adalah tulisan ku terakhir di laman ini
you're a great friend.
thank you.
im sorry.
bye

Stranger

2007-09-28T14:09:00.001+08:00

Stranger than your sympathy
And this is my apology
I killed myself from the inside out
And all my fears have pushed you out

And I wished for things that I don’t need
(all I wanted)
And what I chased won’t set me free
(all I wanted)
And I get scared but I’m not crawlin’ on my knees

Oh, yeah
Everything’s all wrong, yeah
Everything’s all wrong, yeah
Where the hell did I think I was?

And stranger than your sympathy
Take these things, so I don’t feel
I’m killing myself from the inside out
And now my head’s been filled with doubt

We’re taught to lead the life you choose
(all I wanted)
You know your love’s run out on you
(all I wanted)
And you can’t see when all your dreams aren’t coming true

Oh, yeah
It’s easy to forget, yeah
When you choke on the regrets, yeah
Who the hell did I think I was?

And stranger than your sympathy
And all these thoughts you stole from me
And I’m not sure where I belong
And no where’s home and no more wrong

And I was in love with things I tried to make you believe I was
And I wouldn’t be the one to kneel before the dreams I wanted
And all the dark and all the lies were all the empty things disguised as me

Mmm, yeah
Stranger than your sympathy
Stranger than your sympathy
Mmm hmmm mmm

sorry

2007-09-28T13:32:00.000+08:00

you're way more mature than me. i dont understand, why u keep telling people
all those stuffs, ( reader : i know its your blog, your right, your place, but hey, who's reading it ha?robots,cats? its your friends)
and when they read about it, what'd they think. what'd they feel.
and i know it is NOT about me that you're writing.

KEPADA READERS DI LUAR SANA, JGN INGAT AKU NI ROBOT DAN TAK ADA PERASAAN. hampa ingat aku tak rasa apa apa ka? hampa ingat aku suka suka buat kat orang ka? hampa ingat aku takda rasa sedih ka?
tolong la . mai duduk dengan aku untuk 2 hari, dan hampa akan tau.
i felt terrible for things that happened. terrible ok.
jgn suka suki tuduh aku mcm mcm, kata aku mcm mcm, just because its your friend. kamon la, think about it. mcm aku tak biasa saja dipersedihkan. aku pun sedih ok.
its life, everybody's broken. deal with it.

to YOU, i dont have anything against you, i dont hate you, i dont want to make u feel bad or anything.
well if you wanna write anything about what u feel, just go on. just dont make other people look bad, dont blame them. no no, jgn.
just think bout this, bila kawan kawan awak baca, of cos diorang akan sebelahi awak, and diorang akan hate that person. but, kalau awak memang nak mcm tu, just go on. nobody is stopping you.

try to forgive people. they're just people and being human. sometimes , we have to choose between A and B. and the decision sometimes, will hurt someone. with us knowing it, or not. we're not intentionally doing it to hurt them. we're just being ourself. And sometimes, other people might have to choose, between us or others. the same thing goes to them.
u know this better, i know u do.
just read this, and think about it.

im sorry if i wrote anything wrong here. and to you too guys.

stop

2007-09-23T18:54:00.000+08:00

well honey, its not only other's fault when things aren't work out.
sometimes we should ask ourself why did it went wrong.
and remember, we cant force anyone, especially their feelings.
stop blaming people, please stop it. its not good for anyone.

end.

2007-08-31T16:20:00.000+08:00

this blog will end here. ( : . thanks everyone. bye bye

matchbox 20 - bright lights - 2nd try.

2007-08-16T12:03:00.000+08:00

matchbox 20 - bright lights

2007-08-13T21:53:00.000+08:00

Hand me down

2007-08-12T14:12:00.000+08:00

this song is for you.sorry sorry

matchbox20 - hand me down.

Someday they'll find your small town world
On a big town avenue
Gonna make you like the way they talk
When they're talking to you
Gonna make you break out of your shell
Cuz they tell you to
Gonna make you like the way they lie
Better than the truth
They'll tell you everthing
You wanted someone else to say
They're gonna break your heart, yeah
From what I've seen
You're just one more hand me down
Cuz no one's tried to give you
What you need
So lay all your troubles down
I am with you now
Somebody oughta take you in
Try to make you love again
Try to make you like the way they feel
When they're under your skin
Never once do you think that they would lie
When they're holding you
Then you wonder why they haven't called
When they said they'd call you
You'll start to wonder
If you're ever gonna make it by
You'll start to think
You were born blind
From what I've seen
You're just one more hand me down
Cuz no one's tried to give you
What you need
So lay all your troubles down
I am with you now
I'm here for the hard times
The straight to your heart times
When living ain't easy
You can stand up against me
And maybe rely on me
And cry on me, yeah
Oh no, no, no
Someday they'll open up your world
Shake you down to the drawing board
Do their best to change you
They still can't erase you
From what I've seen
You're just one more hand me down
Cuz no one's tried to give you
What you need
So lay all your troubles down
I am with you now
Lay them down on me
You're just one more hand me down
And all those nights don't give you
What you need
So lay all your troubles down
On me

seeing is believing, dreaming is reality

2007-08-12T03:57:00.000+08:00

ok fine, semua benda aku buat salah.
so salah kan aku atas semua benda yg jadi. jgn salahkan org lain.
im the bad guy here. not anyone else.
yesterday a friend, harini tak mengaku.
takpalah, aku hanya rakan convertible, harini bleh jadi , esok jadi org lain, lusa jadi benda lain.
harini baik, cakap elok2. esok tak baik, cakap lebih kurang.

ada ayat org putih cakap - "live in my shoes for a moment, and you'll understand"
jgn la asek hentam saja. think!

life aint easy!

2007-08-09T08:30:00.000+08:00

( :

hmm

2007-06-04T05:30:00.000+08:00

back from ipoh. kenduri kendara yg best jumpa kezens. and also i met fza. tapi...entah la, rasa mcm i should shut my mouth and be a robot that only says yes or no. its like everything comes out wrong from my mouth

hello out there!

2007-05-09T15:46:00.000+08:00

hello out there!
sometimes i think that somewhere out there, in other parts of the world, few stranger is reading this blog. are you one of them??

just read over my blog and i noticed, port have a blog too! yeay. i'll link you man!

well it is May. my bday has past, her bday, and many bdays!!!! im a taurian, so, lets read about me. they call the Taurian, The Tramp!

Tramp (trămp)

v., tramped, tramp·ing, tramps. v.intr.

To walk with a firm, heavy step; trudge.
1. To travel on foot; hike.
2. To wander about aimlessly.

v.tr.

To traverse on foot: tramp the fields.
To tread down; trample: tramp down snow.

1. A heavy footfall.
2. The sound produced by heavy walking or marching.
A walking trip; a hike.
One who travels aimlessly about on foot, doing odd jobs or begging for a living; a vagrant.
1. A prostitute.
2. A person regarded as promiscuous.
Nautical. A tramp steamer.
A metal plate attached to the sole of a shoe for protection, as when spading ground.

well, most if it is true

TAURUS - The Tramp
Aggressive. Loves being in long
relationships. Likes to give a good
fight for what they want. Extremely
outgoing. Loves to help people in times
of need. Good kisser. Good personality.
Stubborn. A caring person. One of a
kind. Not one to mess with. Are the
most attractive people on earth! 15
years of bad luck if you do not
forward

I LOVE SYAMZA.END.

weekend

2007-02-09T23:59:00.000+08:00

ok i have audition for the audiowarfare tomorrow,
not that i have audition, im handling it.
by the way, i dont know what i should write here, and.
it seems to me that i absolutely have nothing interesting i can share with you guys,
even if i do, i wont be sharing it to much with you. no no not my life with you.
the truth is my life is boring. all day i will always think what to do for my band, or for other people, for example, the battle of the bands. i seldom think ways to enjoy myself.
ok done.

btw, i still hope that i never knew her, u know like one day you wake up and u cant remember a thing? its pain. its pain.
but no, life wasnt like that.
we have to breathe the air and walk the earth , look forward and live life.

but still, i never wanted to not knowing her. hmm.
nevermind, life is bigger than me. people wont event notice if im gone, not her certainly.

whats up with her? you wanna know what HER name? hehe nop.

Please stop pretending to be someone or anyone that you're not. just be yourself, you know who you are, and where u came.

do you blog?

2007-02-07T02:20:00.000+08:00

hey there.
hello? hello?
is there anyone out there still read this blog?
should it write?

im not a good life blogger.
by the way, i tend to visit the links of blogs on my page , most of are them my friends' blog, none of them are active now, what happened to them? am i the only one blogging? do you blog? let me know if you're alive

i used to have a good friend, and i used to think SHE can be a good friend, but i don't know now. i guess friends can be so mean.

hey! i been thinking to join the sparc talentime this year. gonna bring The Bubbles song to it! visit my project band, The Bubbles

helo melo ya

2007-02-04T19:59:00.000+08:00

what i suppose to write today?
im totally broke this weekend, so i just spending the time at home watching movies and my fav tv shows, theoc.
i did learned something from the ep, that , everyone will get in love for a certain time, or wanted to be love, and one day they'll realize that they actually the thing they need is not what they really want. you might want to have a lover, but after having it for a year,two, everyone might have a thought that they'll need space, away from it. i think i know the reason why.

we need to learn to love ourself first, get to know ourself better, before we really can love anyone else.

helo

2007-02-02T19:42:00.002+08:00

i hope i never met her.
seriously

helo

2007-02-02T19:42:00.001+08:00

i hope i never met her.
seriously

helo

2007-02-02T19:42:00.000+08:00

i hope i never met her.
seriously

hah?

2007-02-01T03:35:00.000+08:00

what should i write tonight?
im having imsomnia back! fuck this.

btw, thanks birthday girl for the pizzas and cokes last night.
i hope the lame paper wont be thrown away.
do take care of yourself okay?

thanks fiza for your GREAT suggestion. eheh. i dont know what to do without u.

i dont have anything to write tonight.
oh ya, just wanna tell u guys something.

MAINSTREAM MUSIC, ARTISTS, AND INDUSTRIES IN MALAYSIA IS SO FUC%$D UP!

WHO ARE THE FUCKED UP PEOPLE?
THE SAT TV PROVIDER,
THEIR FUCKUP SHOW, THEIR FUCKING AKADEMI,
THEIR FUCKED UP ARTIST.

THEY ARE SO FUCKED UP, TIL THEY HAVE TO ASK US TO SEND SMS TO MAKE THEM RICH.
AND TO MAINSTREAM ARTIST,

WHO?
SITI HANURZALI? ZAHOD AF? UMAWEEMAWEE?
damn, did you guys ever read in newspapers, or mags, or anywhere,
how many did these artist sold of any of their albums?
why did their album sales are not good?

reason;

1. the album itself.
as yourself. of any mainstream artist that you like, pick one,
do you remember the album's title?
do you remember how many tracks are on them?
how many songs on the album that are really good?
you probably listen their song(s) aired on radio, or broadcast on tele. how many song of their album get to be hits? one? two? do you think that song on radio because its good? nop, their PR asked those station to spin the cd.
lets take a good example, dont take Madonna, or Kylie, let say, we take an artist that was underrated and being criticized, Paris Hilton.
she came out with the single, Stars Are Blind. it became hits!
then Nothing in this world (its a great song to me, nice video clip). both became hits.
even though, she is a well known famous person, the simple life, the chain hotel, but still her songs get hits. its not about the singer, its about their songs (not to mention here, MOST mainstream artists dont write their song, composer did)

And what happen to our famous amous artists ?i heard they get like 15k-30k for a dinner show. thats all they can eat from.

Not album sales. not royalty. they get money from POLITICIANS' dinner, or any RICH PEOPLE's dinner. yeah, its true. and for our artist, gossips talks more than their songs. bullshit isnt?

and one more thing, THE COMPOSER.
do you know the composers of malaysia? i dont want to mention their name here, (because i dont wanna get sued(government is reading this),and i dont know).

MALAYSIAN MAINSTREAM MUSIC IS SUCKS. YOU GUYS PRODUCED CRAP MUSIC. I THINK ITS THE TIME WE FIND NEW COMPOSERS WHO HAVE NEW IDEAS,CREATIVITY, RATHER THAN LISTEN TO THESE SO-YESTERDAY COMPOSERS.

2. price of the album

not to many words here, THE RECORD STORES ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS. THE TOWERECORDS, THE SPEEDY, THOSE STORES. THEY ARE THE ONE THAT RESPONSIBLE FOR OUR LOCAL ARTIST CDS SOLD AT RM42.
MALAYSIAN PEOPLE ARE NOT REACH, THEY CANT BUY CD AT THIS PRICE.THEY'D PREFER BUY PIRATED CD AT RM10.
Lower the CD price at RM20 and you'll see the result.
we'll get more sales, artists will get more royalty, record label can afford to produce more great albums.

FUCK RECORD STORE!

3. the artist

stop being idiots and start being an artist. NO MORE AKADEMI, NO MORE OBSESSIVE GOSSIPS, NO MORE RELYING ON POLITICIAN'S DINNER FOR MONEY (DONT YOU WANT TO SING IN YOUR SOLO CONCERT WHERE PEOPLE WOULD BY THE TICKETS AT RM50 AND 10 THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE COME TO SEE YOUR SHOW?)
NO NO, thats is not what happening in malaysia. here, the tv channel, and the Satellite tv are organizing the concert. too bad, the artist cant stand on their own!wait a minute, these are free concert, we dont have to buy tickets, yeay! and wait a minute, they sing other artists' songs! and indonesian artist song. yeah.people dont want to listen to their own song. whats the song name by acha and that sissy?

i talked to a dancer last year, he was a dancer for artists for concert for a sat tv,
he did asked me something like this,

"knapa artis malaysia tak boleh pergi jauh" (why malaysian artists (mainstream) cant go further),
i said i dont know.
then he told me, "because they are too busy reading about their gossips and other artist gossips, they dont even want to learn dancing and singing"

he got a point!

you know the international artist?
fergie, rihanna, madonna, these artist are very good in singing, and they're good in dancing too. people would go to their concert, to see they sing and dance. a hell of a show!.

and what happened to our artist? THEY ONLY CAN SING (IF THEY'RE REALLY GOOD AT)

4. the buyer.

FUCK BUYER. im a malaysian people and i do meant it. MALAYSIAN PEOPLE DONT KNOW HOW TO APPRECIATE ART, THEY LIKE MUSIC, THEY LIKE ART, THEY JUST DONT KNOW HOW TO APPRECIATE IT.

you know why?

they listen to radio everyday, watch fucking tv shows about music, vote SMS for the person. but when it come to buying their loving artist's CD,most of them, they never buy it, they buy the pirated cd (sometimes have bonus track, the pirated song from other artist, yeay!) , or download it.

thats not a problem, maybe they dont have money to buy the cd as we discussed earlier.

THEY DONT EVEN WANT TO PAY TO SEE THESE ARTIST'S SHOW.MALAYSIAN PEOPLE ALWAYS WANT FREEEEEEEEEE FOR EVERYTHING.

I wrote all these things, based on my experienced and what i know. im not just saying these things.
And the fact that im into both mainstream and underground music really make me feel good.
I love underground music, i play in a band. we write our own song, we produce our own album, we write our own lyrics, we do everything!
we never rely on POLITICIAN DINNER to get money, we play at local gig where sometimes only 20 people showed up. sometimes they pay us RM10 sometimes they dont. still im happy with it.
I buy cd of bands that i really like, or download their album, and go their shows. i dont mind spending my money on that.

DO YOU MIND SPENDING YOUR MONEY FOR THE MUSIC? ASK YOURSELF.
YOU LIKE BLACK EYE PEAS SO MUCH, YOU LIKE AKON, YOU LIKE LIMP BIZKIT, but have you ever buy their any CD?

i feel like writing

2007-02-01T02:33:00.000+08:00

2007?

2007-01-30T14:23:00.000+08:00

hello, the not so much reader. (thanks for reading anyway)

damn, its been a month since we hit 2007 and again all of us getting older no matter how. not only us, our mother, father, brothers, sisters, friends and everyone too.
somehow they'll get old, and will leave us to somewhere, or God.
My advise is as always; Live your life as you will never have tomorrow (my grammar sucks, i dont care)
2007, will be a hard year for me. i know.
lets start with what happened last year(s).
i screwed up my the eBay business, now i'd have to start again from zero.
i have so many debt i have to pay back. (the australian trip did took all my money)
i met girls that i shouldnt met.
ok thats it.
well what i'd have to now, is to start the biz back. getting the money flows in back!
now that i purely independent from parent, i;d have to find my own money. do you think its easy?
and after that, pay all my debt back. hopefully by mid year i'll settle everything. and get my business on track so i can be rich again.
about girl problem. hmm im not good in this. i guess... i'll just leave this matter and let it be what it wanted to be.
shit i had a CRUSH and i still can get her out of my mind like i used to do. maybe i do really like her so much. nevermind.
as people say, time will heal, and i hope so.

anyway im gonna leave this cyberjaya for intern after this trimester, and i dont really know what gonna happen after that. am i going to come back, or cont. working, or leave and go somewhere?

ive promised myself that i wanted to go and meet all my friends who is still in college. i should do this. i should. i want a car i want a car.

the facts that i dont have gf for a long time, is because of my friends. i spent to much time with them, tooooo much time. i enjoyed my time with them, i always forgot that i dont have a gf. the fact that, i still have a frame of picture, of my classmates in Form 5,on my desk , should tell you everything.

Its not that i dont have any girl friends, i do have. alot. i occasionally go out with them. but i dont know why. maybe im to choosy or i don't want to choose at all.i dont know.

its gonna be a great year. if i finish my GAMMA year in mmu (the major subject), i've consider myself a step away from graduating and get my Degree and show them to my father. hehe.

and my brother and her wife is coming back this June, also aDam in february, and my best friend faiz puat is coming back this summer. ahhhh its gonna be ghreat.

till then, see you guys soon!

THE WISH LIST

2006-11-16T00:14:00.001+08:00

Hi guys, ssup?
im feeling shit right now, and i have mood to write something and there's a lot of mosquitos in my room eventhough im at 7th floor and ive been trying to kill them using my deodorant spray.
it coming to the end of the year now, and i just wanna recall back the lasy year's "WANT IT NOW" list. let see...

1. A BASS guitar. really nice one - well never had money to buy this
2. record the-fucking-death-metal-greatest-fucking-song, haha, about 3 songs and jam it, yah and dont forget to gather back my band. the band name is ENDLESS , does anyone here have other suggestion? DONE this, but the band name is Mind Machine now, and we've recorded 4 songs and more to be done later.
3. I need money, to continue my study, or im dead. well pretty much the same now
4. new tyres for my scooter ahahahha. err which scooter? i got myself another scooter, a VS125 now. LOL
5. yah, i need a digital camera really bad. still... agh
6. a girlfriend. <--- this one, you might skip. nope, not yet. and this certainly wont be in next year's list because i dont want to have
7. i want to see she grads, and im going to wear suit and give flowers to her on her graduation day, and hoping she can fly after that, maybe Pan AM or MAS. this..did not happen as she didnt inform me, maybe you guys can read it somewhere in my blog
8. still, a driving licences (ada dua tu) GOT THISS!!!!! and i treat my friends 300pcs of satay for my Nazar
9. quit MMU and be a fulltime musician, or go travel. i might catch her somewhere. havent quit yet, and still part time musician, but i did travel, to Melbourne. yeah!
10. go to Dublin, and see U2 live. this...maybe next year
11. help my family out, especially my mother and brothers. still
12. a girlfriend. <-- skip. no
13. a singaporean bank account. no
14. a cooper ! not yet
15. b a good person. not yet

i think i've done good job with the list, considering that most of them has been done. the others...maybe later, or never. im going to come out with next year's list soon, and i think everyone should.

going off this weekend to Tampin for the Astro concert again. cya

THE WISH LIST

2006-11-16T00:14:00.000+08:00

friends and family

2006-11-07T18:39:00.001+08:00

hey all, whutsup?
sudah raya ke brapa ya skarang? tah tak ingat.
hmm well let start on my puasa, puasa is as usual, cuma this year, its a lil different from past years.
on 16th october i took off from KLIA to Melbourne to watch a concert that held at St. Kilda beach, The Palace. and i got back on 21st oct. (i'll write about it more in next entry).
raya is as always, i went to my kampung dekat Pendang Kedah and friends house around Alor Star town. and hanging out with my mom and brothers. my older brother not here he is in Dublin with her wife. they live there.
And on raya ke 8 kot i went with nasran and bah to Sungai petani , 2 good friend's house there.
And now cuti pun dah habis, everyone went back to where they came from, working, studying. My semester, or to be exact trimester (they use this term in MMU) started yesterday, and i havent register any subject yet, i cant because been barred by MMU's finance dept.
shit la, tiap2 sem kena bar. bosan betul.

and im broke now, after balik dari Melbourne where i spent byk sangat beli kat kawan2 adik2 mak. damn skarang nak kena recover balik aduh.

Oh ya, im working now with Top Response Sdn Bhd, as artist coordinator for Astro's Gegak Gemilang concert that will tour major city like Batu Pahat, Ipoh, Klang, Alor star, Seberang Prai , Kuantan.
I responsible for a female top artist.

Im now back in Sri Kembangan, trying to settle everything up, bills, rent , argh, i wish i have 1 million now. then i wouldnt have to think of anything.
I just watched The O.C season 4 episode 1 (adam tolong jgn gelak ok, aku tengok cerita ni sebab aku dah follow since day 1 dan aku bukan lelaki OC atau TTDI/HARTAMAS yang tak reti buat apa2 dan sissy) .

Sangat sedih lah my Mischa Barton has gone forever, tbe. Marissa Cooper . rest in peach darling. wanna know more please watch it ok?
And im listening to Lostprophets - Always All Ways. remind me of this life. you know.
when i think back,i've lost many people i love over the years. family or friends.

Ada kawan pun which i am very close hilang and nowhere to be heard, ada kawan pun yg dah berubah, dah meninggal dan mcm2 lagi. not to mention family. listening to this song remind me yg i am getting older and older everyday. so do everyone. and made me think that life is short and death can come anytime.

i PROMISE to myself that, next year, when i dont have financial problem, i'd travel around Malaysia to see all my friends, rapat atau tak, in all universities and colleges, cousins, aunts, uncles, semua. i'd be very good if i have car (: . i dont care but i will do it next year before everyone change again, or gone forever. that's my new year resolution.

And purposely i think God dont give me a girlfriend maybe HE dont want me to suffer. its better when you have nothing to lose kan? and i'll use this opportunity to do what i just said.
when i look back, i think the only person that doesnt move on with his past life is me. i miss all friends before and i want to see them. even my only ex, denna which i never talk since ......2001 since we broke up.

You know, when you dont have everything, you'll love anything that you have. i dont have rich family, i dont have girlfriends, i dont have big car or anything, but i do have great brothers, mother, father, and friends. i will stick with them until i die. whereever and whatever i do.

to all my friends reading this, know that i love you and if i owe you guys apology, or i do wrong, please forgive me in this good Syawal ok? hutang duit tu akan di bayar lah hehe.

nothing

2006-10-29T17:24:00.000+08:00

nothing to write here, maybe later.
to YOU. just to let you know, you're RUDE!
you dont even know how to thanks.
and as a friend, it hurts me. you dont even know how
hard i tried to help.
"i came to KL just for the job" ? its not for the interview?

today on 4th sept.

2006-09-04T14:34:00.000+08:00

last night i had a long sleep again, 9pm - 10am this morning.
just checking over orders from customers. well i have 19 orders pending and need to be shipped out.

ebay is nice. i support my living with eBay
ebay is bidding, bidding is business, business is goooooood!

visit my ebay store here (:

ebay store

my flickr page

2006-09-03T20:16:00.000+08:00

http://www.flickr.com/photos/netelie/

i-hack 2006.

2006-09-03T19:50:00.000+08:00

well i just got back from the itm's i-hack 2006 and im damn tired. this is my first time i involved in REAL computer intrusion as we say it "hacking" world.

details:
i dont really know much about hacking or computer security nowadays, as i only have basic knowledges and concepts about it. my team mate, crash (esco) asked me to join it, and i said why not, just to gain experience hey!
Last time i remember doing all this computer stuff were back in my alpha year in mmu, it is 2003, 3 years ago. lots of things changed nowadays and i never update my computer security skills.

The competition start 2nd sept with the Forensic challenge.
OUR group name is skullb0x- (taken from antitrust movie)

our task is given on the website, and we need to find bugs, hidden message, doing some reverse engineering, not to mention social engineering (: .
well, we (me as kevin and esco) lost for few hours and didnt know what to do. until we decided to use reverse engineering, reading program's hash code and hexadecimals.
damn i seriously taktau apa2 about this sebab dah lama sangat tinggal.
we were given viruses and worms (like brontok.exe) and we must find what the virus did and something like that.
There were 5 flags to be captured , and we managed to capture only 1 flag. well i think that's a good start for us . esco is studying public service and me studying design. hehe.
congrats to ITM's team they won the challenge (well no wonder because they are computer science students anyway)

2nd day is CTF (capture the flag) challenge.

well today we started pretty slow, there are 10 flags to be capture.
today was all about hacking and computer intrusion. unfortunately none of us expert in it.
i found 2 flags and esco almost found 1 flag but we manage to get ourself an encrypted phrase. we have no idea how to decrypte it and we leave it. we only get 2 flags out of 10.
But lucky for me, for less than 24 hours i learn basic concepts about sql injections.
well now that i know, there's no turning back.
ammar and suff (ammar was my schoolmate) team from Project Tango (they're from UTP) won it with 7 captured flags. congrats.
well today was fun. and it was funny too. hacking is only for my knowledge.. somebody did said to me i should learn IT rather than design heh.
go to my flickr page for more pictas!

hmm

2006-08-19T02:09:00.000+08:00

hey it is 2:05am .

from my last post, i received comment abt it.
i dont know you're graduating, i have no idea at all. if i know, i'll definately go there.
tapi takpalah, its my fault that i dont know and its my fault i didnt say anything to you.
well you just take care of yourself and your family. and if you get married or anything in future, good luck then and congrats then.
im not gonna be long to wish u all that.